You can't take your eyes off it. It's the one you've dreamed of. You can't see yourself being with any other, but then there is hesitation and maybe shock. The decision you're about to make is like jumping off a cliff! Saying "yes" to your groom was the easy part, but this is another story. Do you jump and get the dress or continue the search hoping for another that tops the one that had you at first glance?
With all the years I've been styling brides and being a bride myself years ago, I know those conflicted feelings well. It really is like jumping off a cliff and much more difficult than saying yes to your groom's proposal. This is your wedding gown. The only garment you'll buy and wear once in a lifetime. It must be perfect and nothing less. So when perfection is on your body staring at you in a mirror in all its glory, why don't you buy it? I've surmised many reasons why. It's a significant financial leap that can be overwhelming. It's your first boutique experience and committing might seem impetuous. You're the type that needs to cost compare and process, which must be done away from the dressing room glare. You have to see yourself in the dress (i.e. a photo someone snapped that, fyi, is discouraged by designers and boutiques). You just like wedding gown shopping because you're a bride once and you're going to hit everyone boutique you can think of. You must show a friend or a family member to help you decide. You're not sure you want to get married after seeing yourself in a gown that makes it all real.
I've never asked brides all the scenarios mentioned, but intuitively I've collected these roadblocks in my mind and believe they are fairly accurate. I absolutely respect the reasons above, please don't misunderstand. However, they are still in fact obstacles in a bride's mind that deprive her of a joyous search and discovery of "her" perfect gown. I emphasize "her" because without attaching the pronoun a perfect gown doesn't exist--really. It is an extremely subjective and yes emotional choice that is as individual as we all are. We are all created as unique individuals with are own taste and style. If you find a gown that matches your unique attributes, it becomes the perfect gown for YOU and only you. I always tell my clients it comes from the heart. Don't fret or be shocked if it happens sooner than you think. Some actually do purchase the first gown they try on! For those who have visited 50 shoppes and leave disappointed each time do some soul searching. Determine what you love the most in a wedding gown on YOU and choose accordingly.
Sure I can sit back and write about this and make it sound easy, but try to trust that it really is. The experience of a woman looking for her special, bridal gown for centuries has been an adored tradition that should be joyous. It's a real glimpse of the wedding day as you imagine your groom next to you while staring at yourself wearing the gown. Make that glimpse a reality and JUMP! Your landing will be soft, airy, sprinkled with sparkle or lace and AMAZING!
Wonderful advice! You've so accurately captured all the 'stuff' going on in a bride's head. Guess I was fortunate to be in a time crunch, because I had no problem 'jumping' once I found the gown in the first store I tried.
ReplyDeleteWish you could have been with me, my dear friend. :)
I love your blog - it should be a must read for all brides and enthusiasts.